Get abuse support with narcissism, and self esteem. Reduce your stress.

Get abuse support with narcissism, and self esteem. Reduce your stress.

Get abuse support with narcissism, and self esteem. Reduce your stress.Get abuse support with narcissism, and self esteem. Reduce your stress.
choices, communication, narcissism, success, abuse, negative thoughts, stress, boundaries, self help

goal setting basics

 Achieving goals is simple. When you follow basic steps, you will continually move forward until the goal is met. Working toward a target helps you feel in control of your life. You will need time, money, materials, knowledge, and/or help from others. 

 Long-range goals are usually accomplished in one to five years. Choose your most important long-range goal and write it on a worksheet. This may be your life's purpose, or any goal. 

Short-range goals are accomplished this month, this week and tomorrow. See “My Vacation” example . These goals help you decide what you need to do immediately and encourage you to believe that your long-range goal is not overwhelming and is possible.

It does not matter how slowly you go, so long as you do not stop.”― Confucius, philosopher and teacher (551-478 BC)

SET SMART GOALS: SPECIFIC, MEASURABLE, ACHIEVABLE, REALISTIC, and TIMED. You must be able to believe your goal to achieve it. You may have to readjust if you discover you have trouble believing it. Simply downgrade it slightly. The more specific and measurable, the quicker your goal will be accomplished. Ask yourself:

  • How will I know I am moving in the right direction?
  • How will I know when I have achieved my goal? How will I know how close I am? What will the results look like?

Example: “I have set small goals. When these goals are met on time, I will be excited and anxious to move to the next step.”

  • Do I have solutions to problems? 

Example: Brainstorm with others, do searched to find out how others solved those problems.

  • How hard am I willing to work? Your goal must compel you to work at it, for you to enjoy the process and stick to it when  the going gets tough.
  • What am I willing to give up to reach my goal? This is another way of asking how important this goal this. Am I willing to give up time, money and fun to reach this goal? If not, it may need to be a lower priority. 

Example: “I am willing to devote as much time as it takes to reach my goal within the date I have set.

  • What degree of commitment am I willing to make? If you commit to your goal and you mean it, your goal is achievable. Don't make a commitment unless you mean it. Don't complain about not reaching your goal if you are not willing to do what it takes.
  • Who will I ask to help me, and what will I ask them to do?
  • Will my goal affect others and how will I work that out  

Intrusive, negative thoughts telling you that you can't reach your goal create doubt. It drains your energy and can stop you. Decide if the doubt is legitimate and what you need to do to remove it. If you choose a goal that is out of context with your life, your values, needs or it is unrealistic with what you believe about yourself, doubt will creep in. You will not be satisfied when your goal is reached. It must fit who you are. State your goals in words believable to you. (See Negative Mind Chatter.)

WRITE YOUR GOALS in clear, concise terms. Don't use words such as: a lot, more, much, less, most, etc. For example, don't say, “I want to ....” State, “By August 8, I will be  living my goal.” Write your goal in short sentences. It is stating where you are now and where you want to be. Read your long-range goal at least once every day.

LIVE YOUR GOAL. Create a picture to the smallest detail of what you want to happen as if it already happened. Use all your senses, sight, smell, taste, feeling.  "The cloth is soft and silky."

CREATE A SUPPORT TEAM. Be selective about who you tell. Some people will discourage you.

LIST POSSIBLE SETBACKS. Create a plan to overcome them. Be flexible and willing to take a risk. Be willing to give something up if you can see that it's not working. Figure out another way to get what you want.

CONSIDER PROJECTS AND ACTIVITIES CAREFULLY. Make sure every activity moves you toward you goal. Identify and prioritize critical steps and when they should be done. Delegate who should do them? Focus on results. Each activity should be considered based on your goal. “How will what I am doing help me get the results I want?” Do not do anything, no matter how much fun, or how beneficial it is unless it moves you toward you goals.

SET DEADLINES. Estimate how much time you need, and then double it. This helps remove discouragement. Avoid last-minute rush jobs. Time needed is based on resources, money and knowledge and the number of steps you need.

DO AT LEAST ONE SIGNIFICANT ACTIVITY EVERY DAY. Don't quit until you reach your daily goals.

“Discipline is remembering what you want.”― Mark Twain


© LifeSkills International 

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